And here is his birth story-
After our positive, natural birth experience with Kai, Aaron
and I planned to have a similar experience with Asher. We shopped around a bit between UNC Midwives,
Midwives with Women’s Health Alliance (WHA), and the Women’s Birth and Wellness
Center. I thought I would be drawn to
the birthing center, but something just didn't feel right about going there
after our tour. I felt at peace when I
met and visited with the midwives at WHA and knew that was the right choice for
us. And it was….( I loved them all
throughout our prenatal and antenatal care.)
My pregnancy was good, a little rough in the middle. I started having regular Braxton Hicks contractions
around 20 weeks, and I anticipated baby boy coming a little earlier, since
everything just felt faster this time. I
also thought to myself towards the end of the pregnancy–“I bet he’ll come at 39
weeks.” And he did….
My Braxton Hicks increased a few days before I went into
active labor. Early labor and Braxton Hicks blended together this time. On Saturday, Sep 29, I got the feeling active
labor was imminent as the contractions became more painful and came more often,
but I was still waiting for more signs of later stage of labor. I had also been having more regular
contractions throughout Friday and Saturday night, as I slept off and on. These contractions were not super intense, and
I could still do things around the house while having them. Nervous about a work project, I stayed up late
Saturday working all night and praying labor didn't start until I got to a good
stopping place. And I did…
On Sunday, Sep 30 (the day I reached 39 weeks), I began need
to stop work as contractions came, although I was not having to groan or moan
through them yet. I was hesitant to announce
“active labor” until I lost the mucus plug, which was that Sunday night around
8:30 pm. By that point, I started to
vocalize the intensity I was feeling. All contractions were centered in my low front
pelvis, just like last birth – menstrual cramps amped up really high. Most
laboring was done standing and leaning on a counter, sitting on my knees or on
the birthing ball at our home. I emailed my second-time mom friends to start
the labor candle tree we planned together (everyone lights a candle for the
laboring mom and sends her prayers and good vibes). I called Metta, a dear friend who was set up
to attend our birth, telling her I wasn’t sure how much longer the labor would
be but we were having baby boy soon. And
we did…
Meanwhile during the day while labor was going on, we were
still trying to get ready for baby boy. “He’s
coming, I know it!” or “At any point,
this is going to kick into high gear!” or “We really need to hurry!” I would be
calling to Aaron. We spent Sunday
packing our hospital bag, setting up baby’s bed, cleaning bathrooms and
kitchen, setting up the car seat, and I appliqued a onesie for baby boy during
the more intense parts (stopping during contractions). It was quite the last minute show. Kai got really hyper during all of this,
perhaps sensing something important was happening, and he has basically stayed
hyper ever since! We finally put Kai
down to bed around 10:30 pm amidst the bustling busyness.
Aaron and I decided to call my parents to pick Kai up around
12:30 am, since things were beginning to pick up. They drove up to Durham and got sleepy Kai
around 1 am. We called Metta again to announce we were going to the hospital within
the next 30 minutes. I decided to go pee
before we left. As I sat down, I felt
baby boy move down and the pain intensify significantly. “We need to go NOW!” I yelled to
Aaron. I got nervous he might come
before we could make it to Durham Regional.
For the next hour or so of loading the car, driving, checking in, and
waiting to see our midwife once we got the hospital room, I was “fighting” the
contractions. Meaning, I was not trying
to open, but to hold him in. And I did…
I began standing and leaning on the bed, swaying side to
side as the contractions continued to amp up.
Metta arrived soon after we did and she was very helpful with her soothing
voice and attentiveness. Aaron was again
rock-star-supportive. I was given a cervical check by a physician
there while we waited on the midwife –“ 7 or 8 cm” she said. “Good,
towards the end!” I thought…”Now, where’s my midwife?” I was asked to lay down on the bed for 20
minutes of fetal monitoring (Why do they make you lay down for that?!), so I
laid on my side with my legs in a semi-squat, bearing some weight on my
hands. They also did several blood draws
during this time. Finally the monitoring was done. “Do you want to move or change positions?”
Metta asked. And I did…
I knew it would hurt worse to be upright, but I also knew it
would speed things up. So, I was helped
up to stand on my knees on the bed, leaning into Aaron for each
contraction. It was super intense at
this point, with contractions coming about every minute. As I worked through these with my eyes
closed, I pictured n birth art image I drew during the pregnancy – a spiral
moving in a circle at the base of my torso, opening me for our baby boy to come
into the world. I kept thinking in between contractions “Why
has my water not broken?! This is way too intense to not be at the end.” I decided to move to the toilet, thinking if
I sat down there it would help the baby to move down more and my water to
break. As I sat down, again, everything
intensified. I exclaimed “Ok, I need to
be checked again NOW!” Juleah, my
favorite midwife came in, and said I was a 10.
(I’m not sure how long I had been at a 10 at this point) “Can I break
your water? It’s right there,“ she said.
I hesitated, with my no-intervention policy. She broke it anyway and said “Op, It broke on
its own”, as she smiled. As soon as my
water broke, I felt a very strong urge to push as baby boy moved down
and my body took over. “Hold on! Let’s move you back to the bed” she
said. Without knowing how that would
happen, Aaron guided my legs and helped me back to the bed. I climbed onto the bed into a squat, as Aaron
and Metta helped bear my weight from under my arms. The next contraction came
soon and I pushed. I felt him move down
significantly and the pain was much, much more intense than I remembered from
Kai’s birth. It felt like I was splitting in two. “I can see the head!” someone said. “He has
dark hair like Kai did” Aaron exclaimed.
His head came out, wrapped loosely in the cord. Juleah slipped the cord off his head. I pushed on the tail end of that contraction
again with all my might, thinking “Get him out of me! It’s too painful!” and he came out. Just like that. No tearing this time! We
arrived at the hospital around 2 am, and he was born an hour after we arrived. Asher Michael Towers
was 7 lbs 12 oz and 20 inches long, born at 3:04 am on Monday, October 1, 2012. Just slightly heavier than his older brother,
and we ended up laboring at the hospital 15 minutes longer with him – if you
can believe that!
We were told to watch for his nostrils flaring or his rib
cage flexing inward, for breathing difficulties. We began to notice both and called the
nurse. He was then taken to the nursery
for observation; Aaron left with him. Metta stayed with me, talking and giving
me an awesome foot massage (Thank you, Metta!). I felt
great, although very shaky. After an
hour or so elapsed, I realized I still hadn’t seen Asher or heard word of
him. We encouraged Metta to go home with
many thanks and much appreciation. By
myself now, I got up and started to walk out into the hall to find the nursery,
a bit worried at this point. Once I
arrived, I found Asher hooked up to several monitors, which seemed to go off in
beeping alarm every few minutes as his oxygenation rate dipped below the set
threshold. It was terrifying. I was told not to pick him up and not to
nurse him. As our minds reeled at this
situation, we thought “time for a blessing.” Aaron gave Asher a priesthood blessing
as I also touched him. Our friends the
Leiningers were wonderful in that Tommy was able to come out within the hour
and give Asher another blessing with Aaron.
Asher ended up staying in the nursery Monday, after being checked for
infections, collapsed lungs, and all sorts of things. I had to breastpump a few times, but was
finally allowed to start breastfeeding him again while he was in the
nursery.
He was finally released to room-in with us Monday night
around 6pm, less than 24 hours later. He
caused quite the scare. I think this was
perhaps why I didn’t feel right at the birthing center, and felt more at peace
with delivering at the hospital. We are grateful
nothing serious was diagnosed….we were ultimately told he retained some fluid
in his lungs, likely because the pushing and birth was so quick he wasn’t
adequately squeezed and aided in this process.
After all of this came breastfeeding craziness again (maybe another post for this), but I was better prepared and armed with more information and resources. We have made it work and Asher is gaining well. I have been feeling really great after this birth and more relaxed. Asher is now getting a little chubbier and cuter each day. He has greatly blessed our family already. We are so appreciative of the support, love, and spiritual strength given to us through our pregnancy, birth, and these sweet days right after his arrival. Thank you!
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